Category: Family Planning & Child Rights

Yes, Having Kids suggested that Prince William and Kate might forgo having a third child. We did so to encourage them to set an example of the most effective thing possible to mitigate climate change and protect the future.

And yes, it appears the Royal family, and what CNN calls the world’s strongest brand, is getting bigger.

That’s OK. Having Kids wishes Prince William, Kate, and their kids all the best.

The truth is that we don’t have to always rely on celebrities to lead by example. Changing this world for the better does not happen overnight.

This week Having Kids will feature two everyday families, families like you and me, families without a lot of money or prestige. But these families care deeply about all of our futures, working to create a sustainable world that nurtures us all. They are showing their concern and dedication by choosing a smaller family, and choosing to save resources and work with other families to plan a fair start in life for every child.

We can all do the same.

• Look at this chart and know this fact: Your and your kids’ future will be less crowded, cleaner, and safer because of what these everyday smaller and generous families are doing.
• Read this article and know this fact: Children are not getting a fair start in life. Some are born poor and some rich. You can’t care about children and fairness and not want to change that.

We always hear that children are the future, But what does that really mean? It means how we plan families today will determine whether our world will be hotter, more crowded, and filled with people who never got a fair start in life, or greener, cleaner, safer, and filled with people born into loving homes where they got what they deserved.

It’s our future. Let’s build it together.

Recently USA Today reported on the Nigerian militant organization Boko Haram’s increasing use of children as human bombs. Already this year, 83 children – including a baby strapped to a girl – have been used as terrorist tools since the beginning of 2017. Bloomberg reports that many of the victims come from families who donated the children, knowing how they would be used.

The stories raise a compelling question: Are there any limits on who should be allowed to have kids?

Do parents who would donate their young children to be blown up by Boko Haram still have a moral or legal right to have more? Should we as a society say nothing about members of ISIS having more kids, given what will happen to them?

These are questions no one is asking. And not because there are no ways to answer them – bioethicists deal with similar questions all the time – but because there appears to be no way to actually implement such limits. Why ask the question if there is nothing we can do about it? How would the United Nations and the international community begin to limit the right, legally and in practice? How should we actually intervene in these situations to stop parents? The notion is almost silly.

But that’s thinking inside the box. It’s almost equally silly to think laws and policies that are not enforced have no impact on our behavior. Such laws and policies do, and are studied under an area of legal theory and research usually referred to as expressive law. Prominent organizations and governments merely taking a position on a controversial subject – that some people are not fit to have children – can have a tremendous impact.

And what does not taking a position mean? That we think it’s ok for parents who would use their children as human bombs to have kids? Is that what we think? Is that the universal norm we all want to be living with?  

Recently, Mike Huckabee took to Facebook to attack Having Kids and insult the parents who run the organization. However, when challenged to either defend his attacks or apologize on multiple occasions (1, 2), Mr. Huckabee was suddenly silent.

It is almost as though he was more interested in getting cheap laughs from his fans than wanting to honestly face the future and help to solve the world’s problems.

In the meantime, we’ve experienced what is likely to be the most expensive disaster in US history. It is estimated that Hurricane Harvey could cost more than Katrina and Sandy combined.

All this suffering and devastation was exacerbated by global warming. And yet another report has come out showing that the most effective way to combat climate change is family planning.

We will ask again: What will it take for us to have an honest, constructive conversation about leaving our children, and their children, a sustainable world where they can have a fair start?

Imagine a parent torturing their own child. Child Protective Services takes in the child to protect him or her, and begin the long process of trying to find a foster family for the child while courts try to deal with the parent. In the middle of this long, drawn-out process, the parent has another child. Because of the prior abuse, this baby also goes into state custody.

Although there are ranges of outcomes and different stories of children who lived through situations like this, if we look at the statistics, we can safely say that the children going through the state system are not, on average, getting a fair start in life. Recent reports found state systems that are failing children across the board. The community loses out too, because it will pay for the costs of this failing child protective and care system, in the short-term and in the long-term as it absorbs scores of unprepared children reared in public systems.

Would it be possible to design a worse system?

There is a solution. In some egregious cases, judges are ordering abusive parents not to have more children. Many courts have upheld those orders as constitutional, finding that a child’s right to a minimum level of well-being should balance against a parent’s right to have a child.

But the process of using these orders is haphazard and undertheorized.

Having Kids strongly believes a child’s right to a fair start overrides other considerations. We are exploring ways to help standardize this process.

And if you agree that the child’s rights should come first, please click and sign our Fair Start Declaration. Thanks so much!

Having Kids’ Open Letter to Prince William and Kate Middleton has attracted a great deal of attention from around the world, with over 50 media outlets picking it up so far.

Instead of discussing the many pressing topics raised in the letter – including the threat the UK faces from climate change, and how family planning is the single most powerful step we can take to address the climate crisis (more) – former Arkansas governor Mike Huckabee took to Facebook to imply that I and Having Kids’ Director of Operations should not have reproduced, thus contending that our child shouldn’t exist.

Mr. Huckabee’s attack on my family is obviously an irrelevant cheap joke to play to his fan base. What is more disturbing, though, is how Mr. Huckabee’s snide attack is symptomatic of the head-in-the-sand attitude that ignores all the challenges humanity faces, now and in the future. These challenges include not only environmental degradation, but also rising inequality.

Our single question to our critics is: Do you think every child born today will have an equal and fair start in life?

Do you think Hillary Clinton’s and Donald Trump’s grandchildren have the same opportunities as those born in Muñiz, TX?

My husband and I realize, compared to the majority of other children in the US and around the world, our child was born with many advantages. That is why we are dedicating much of our time and resources to helping others, rather than simply pursuing our personal short-term interests.

Instead of attacking and mocking people dedicated to making the world a better place for all, maybe we should reconsider our tone and tactics. We can each help more children have a Fair Start. We hope Mr. Huckabee agrees. Regardless, we hope you will be a part of this work. Thanks!

–Anne