Category: Responsible Parenting & Smaller Families

  • The Oceans Our Kids Will Play In: Hot, Acidic, and Empty?

    The Oceans Our Kids Will Play In: Hot, Acidic, and Empty?

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    We hear a lot about rising temperatures over land as our planet’s atmosphere continues to degrade, in large part thanks to a population headed towards ten billion people by 2050. But the fact is that our oceans are in many ways ground zero for climate change. They’ve continued to warm and become more acidic after absorbing much of the heat and carbon dioxide caused by human growth. New studies also show that, while the oceans themselves are changing, the fishing industry worldwide is decimating whole fisheries to feed the world’s growing population. Yet in the face of all of this change, some are pushing for even larger families and even more consumption:

    The UN population division’s latest work on low-fertility and aging is eye popping and is meant to inform policy makers about their options. It includes ominous predictions about economic and social ills and shows how the crisis is most acute in countries that are poorest. “Population aging must be understood and addressed by all countries,” John Wilmoth, the lead demographer at the UN Population Division, said at a gathering at UN headquarters in November.

    At Having Kids we value our oceans, nature, and a safe, clean, and healthy future for children over the unsustainable and population-fueled economic growth that has lead us where we are today. It’s time to move towards a better model of parenting and to stand against those whose greed threatens our oceans, our children, and our future.

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  • Family Planning Dynamics & the Having Kids Model

    Family Planning Dynamics & the Having Kids Model

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    The story of families in Tanzania provides a great example of how family planning efforts — if fully funded — could protect women, children, and the environment all at the same time.

    Tanzania is a large country; it’s about the size of Texas and Colorado combined. Tanzania’s population is quite young: as of 2014, 45% of the population was under the age of 15. It’s the 6th most populated country in Africa, with 52.3 million people. By 2030—only 15 years from now—the population is projected to rise to 79.4 million, and by 2050, unless the birth rate slows substantially, there will be 2.5 times as many people in Tanzania as there are today, 129.4 million, which would make it the 15th largest country in the world.

    What is driving the rapid population increase? Only 26% of married women use modern contraception, compared with 53% next door in Kenya. In the Kigoma region of western Tanzania, the rate falls to 14%, among the lowest in the world. Forty one percent of women in Kigoma have an unmet need for contraception. The total fertility rate in western Tanzania is 7.1, among the very highest in the world. Having babies in rapid succession is often accompanied by high maternal mortality. There is an urgent need to make voluntary contraception more available in places like rural western Tanzania so that women and their families are able to live healthier, productive lives and space and plan their families.

    How can we strengthen demands for increased funding of contraception beyond the plea to simply make it “accessible?” Perhaps it’s time to embrace an objective and universal model of smaller families working together to invest more in each child, rather than traditional and subjective models that do not address family size, community involvement, and minimum standards of wellbeing and equality for future children.

    It’s not just countries like Tanzania that need this change — all of our futures depend on it.

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  • Switching Off Sperm: the Future of Male Contraception?

    Switching Off Sperm: the Future of Male Contraception?

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    Research is underway on a new device that would allow men to control their fertility by literally flicking a switch. Given that a recent study confirmed that a whopping forty percent of pregnancies worldwide are unplanned, this kind of male contraception could have a dramatic impact. Besides affecting parental and child wellbeing, it would have long-reaching effects on the health of our environment. What might the world have looked like today if something as simple as a “switch” had been available decades ago?

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  • Motherhood, Redefined

    Motherhood, Redefined

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    Actor Kim Cattrall is speaking out on motherhood — despite having no biological children. “[T]here is a way to become a mother in this day and age that doesn’t include your name on the child’s birth certificate. You can express that maternal side very clearly, very strongly.”

    How? By helping to play a role in children’s and young adults’ lives. Kim highlights her work with young actors and her own nieces and nephews as being meaningful ways for her to make a difference in the lives of children. In other words, Kim embodies Having Kids’ goal of all people working together to invest more in each child. Would the world be a better place if more people mothered the way Kim does, cooperating to maximize care for the people we have, rather than increasing the number of people who need care? It’s a conversation worth having.

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  • Families in the Forest

    Families in the Forest

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    One school in the United Kingdom takes a direct approach to building a community in nature. The Pencoed Primary School has won the Royal Forestry Society gold award for a program that focuses on developing self-esteem and confidence by having children and their families work together in nature-based team building activities. For example, participants learn how to build campfires and use them for cooking.

    The program exemplifies a deep connection between families and the natural, nonhuman world around them. It also embodies the spirit of connectedness and engaged parenting that Having Kids celebrates. We’d love to see more opportunities like this for kids and their parents to learn together.

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  • Child Brides in the USA?

    Child Brides in the USA?

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    Mention child brides and most people will assume they exist only outside of the United States. But the reality is that thousands of children in the United States have recently taken marital vows. Most are girls married to adult men thanks to “parental consent” and other legal loopholes in minimum marriage age laws. These loopholes stem from a view of the family as isolated from the rest of society and a culture of parenting that lets parents control and limit their children’s future, including marrying them off to be wives – and mothers – before they are even adults.

    Let’s change that paradigm.

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  • Parental Regret: It’s Real.

    Parental Regret: It’s Real.

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    When given the chance to anonymously admit to their regret for having kids, many parents shared their stories. Their reasons are varied, and they love their children, but they know they didn’t make the best decision for themselves.

    These parents are in a lose-lose situation: the parents themselves struggle in isolation to provide the basics and to feel fulfilled, and the children struggle to get what they deserve. So what’s the alternative?

    Imagine a system where adults are encouraged (through tangible benefits like tax incentives and through a shift in society’s thinking about children) not to have children until they are truly ready. And when they are ready, they can work together with other parents (through things like small family trusts) to invest more in each child. And if they choose not to have children but instead decide to help other people’s kids, their philanthropy is welcomed.

    These parents’ admissions of regret suggest that we need to look for alternatives to our current system. The Having Kids model can help.

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  • Give All Kids an Equal Start

    Give All Kids an Equal Start

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    Two recent stories about the lives of poor kids growing up in the United States shed light on how crucial it is for all kids to have an equal start in life. Unfortunately, both articles show just how far we have to go to achieve that equality.

    Data shows that disadvantages in early childhood development determine the rest of a child’s life. And the day-to-day life of children varies dramatically depending on the conditions in which they are born. It’s time we let go of the myth that people are born equal in any way that really matters, and it’s clear that our “luck of the draw” system for deciding who gets what at birth needs to go. 

    Instead, let’s embrace parenting models that move resources from the rich to the poor to give all children a fair start in life.

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  • Adoption: A First Choice for First Kids

    Adoption: A First Choice for First Kids

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    Currently 100,000 children in foster care across the country sit in limbo waiting to join forever families. The adoption group Families in Mississippi for Kids says that many of these children have special needs, come to foster care at a very young age, and often remain in the system until they are teens and age out. While foster care can be very difficult for children, adoptees have a much greater chance of success and often thrive when they find a permanent home. Take Destini Stanford of Hendersonville, NC for instance. Destini spent many years in foster care until she was adopted at age 16. Now, she has overcome habitual shyness to become a public spokesperson for foster children and the benefits of adoption.

    Choosing to adopt allows parents to do a lot of good, both for the child who need a home and for themselves. Rather than having a first, second, or third biological child, prospective parents should consider adoption not as an alternative, but rather as an authentic way to experience parenting and share mutual love with a child who already exists and desperately needs to be loved. The Having Kids model encourages adoption, whether for one or all of a family’s children.

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